John Whittaker Berates Child After The Child Mentioned Wanting A Television For Christmas

ODYSSEY, USA – Today, a child came into the popular ice cream shop, Whit’s End. Frank, age 7, ordered a small hot fudge sundae with his parents. Mr. Whittaker, who owns this establishment, attempted to make small talk and asked the young boy what he wanted for Christmas.

Frank replied that his family’s television broke that year, and he wanted a television so he could watch the Adventures in Odyssey animated series. Mr. Whittaker descended into a fit of rage “I’LL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT OWNING A TELEVISION IS A SIN!! TELEVISIONS ARE EVIL AND CORRUPT EVEN THE BEST OF US! ASK FOR SOMETHING LIKE A BIBLE OR A CASSETTE PLAYER!! ALL YOU YOUNGUNS’ THESE DAYS WANT ALL THIS SINFUL TECHNOLOGY!”

Frank burst into tears and his parents promptly left with their son. They will never be returning and hope others will hear their story and think twice before going to this business.

According to a statement from Whit’s End, John Whittaker was having a tough day and was triggered by the mention of an animated series he believes to be heretical.


Comments

4 responses to “John Whittaker Berates Child After The Child Mentioned Wanting A Television For Christmas”

  1. One of my new favourites of the SONN posts!

  2. oh my gosh😂😂 that’s wonderful

  3. […] This is only my second favorite SONN post. It’s a hoot and written by John Tuttle III.John Whittaker Berates Child After The Child Mentioned Wanting A Television For Christmas- I mean, do I need to explain this one? Well, I guess I do in case you haven’t read it. […]

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